As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember ...
1. Jim Bakker and Jimmy Swaggert have written
an impressive new book. It's called
"Ministers Do More Than Lay People."
2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink,
and be Mary.
3. The difference between the Pope and
your boss is that the Pope expects you
to kiss only his ring.
4. My mind works like lightning -- one brilliant
flash and it's gone.
5. The only time the world beats a path to
your door is if you're in the bathroom.
6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once.
The seat folded up, the drink spilled, and
that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.
7. It used to be only death and taxes that
were inevitable. Now, of course, there's
shipping and handling, too.
8. A husband is someone who, after taking
the trash out, gives the impression that
h e just cleaned the whole house.
9. My next house will have no kitchen -- just
vending machines and a large trash can.
10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic
might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he
told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."
11. Definition of a teenager: God's punishment
for enjoying sex.
12. As you slide down the banister of life, may
the splinters never point the wrong way.
The Banister of Life
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The Banister of Life
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