How To Get Women ...HOT...!!!

[ADF-CaptCC]

One Man Writes:
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men  and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars  thing. I've never
figured out why men think with their head and women with their  heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were  getting into
bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually  says "I don't feel
like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!!  What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet  dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman  enough for me to
satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my  puzzled look by
saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do  for you in the
bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that  night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of  work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping  at a big, big unnamed
department store. I walked around with her while she tried  on several different
very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to  take so I told her
we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment  her new clothes,
so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the  jewelry department
where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell  you...she was
so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a  shipwreck. I
started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis  bracelet when
she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for  a loop when
I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual  satisfaction from
all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she  finally said,
"I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I  could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
like  it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a  baffled WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for  a while. You're
just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me  to satisfy
your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like  she was
going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and  not
for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight  either....but at least that B R CH
knows I'm smarter than her.

[MitcH]

lmfao not gettin any TONIGHT!?!?...what about the rest of ya life m8?